Another lesson that needed to be learned. Be careful what you ask for when looking for support from others. You may want to hear what they say. But the results may be worse than the truth.
It is interesting when reaching out to others looking for support. And you will find them. Well intentioned people who support you. Who support your side of any argument. Validating your opinions. Voicing their views in chorus with yours. Making you feel vindicated in your thoughts, emotions, actions.
But sometimes, your side is wrong. Sometimes your not the side of righteousness and honor. Sometimes your side, driven by the support of the well intentioned, is blurred by emotions. Like looking through a window streaked with rain, your argument is streaked by fear, anger, hurt, insecurity.
When you allow others to move you to action based on emotion, the consequences can be dire. The devastation left behind is so complete, all you can do is sit and wonder how this happened when so many said you are right.
Guess what? You were wrong. And so were they. You have a right to your feelings. You have a right to express them. But you do not have a right to wield them like a sharpened sword with the intention of hurting someone else. Even if they hurt you first.
Sometimes you need to look past it all. Quiet the noise. Take time. Move away from the emotion and think with a clear heart. Sometime you need to think less like an emotional sub having a tantrum and more like an adult reaching to your Dom for help. Tantrums, hurtful words, accusations, they never get the results you want. Honesty, acceptance of your emotions and your part in them, humility in your submission, those get results.
I have been the giver of both. And I can say, without hesitation, if this truth bothers you, so be it. I won’t apologize for being the truth you need.